"Try not to think"

DIARY

Yesterday was a pretty mundane busy Monday.
Work from 8 to 5:30. An hour bus ride home.
Rehearse 7 to 10.
Collapse.

The end of rehearsal, however is worth comment.

Yesterday we finished up a series of Improvisation exercises by Viola Spolin aimed towards awareness and perception. The next series of exercises are character driven, and are inspired by Stanislavsky, Meisner, and Peter Brook, but I found a compelling segue between the two.

* * * * *

During Scavhunt I was judging an item at the Seminary Co-Op with several other judges, including Jessica. I noticed a book sitting on the counter entitled Astonish Yourself! 101 experiments in the philosophy of everyday life, by Roger-Pol Droit. I picked it up and started reading, and Jess mentioned that it looked like something I'd find interesting, so she had bought it several weeks earlier.

The book is very "French philosophy" if you catch my meaning. Very chameleon Camuslike. Indulgent and woozy and abstract, but frankly, often fun.

The thing is, they're perfect for transition, because they all explore a mode of perception, but in a much more ambiguous and open way than the Spolin exercises we've performed, which almost approached games.

To begin, we took a walk during which we randomly determined direction by coin toss at each intersection. Our walk began at 60th and Ellis, ran north to 59th, west to Maryland, north to 57th, east to Drexel, north to 56th, west to Cottage Grove, south to 58th, and finally east to Maryland, where we stopped and performed the experiment: #39. "Try not to think."

I'll only quote a little, in case you'd like to check out the book:

The most effective training consists in letting your thoughts flow by. Don't stop them (impossible) but don't hold on to them (possible). Observe them as you do passing clouds, far off and inevitable. Imitate the indifference of the sky. Persevere in remaining yourself unclouded, and pay no attention to what is passing by.

* * * * *

We attempted not thinking for about ten minutes.

I have to say I enjoyed this thoroughly.
It was impossible of course... the second I caught myself "not thinking," I thought about it, so it essentially became an exercise in glazing over, which I do often enough without effort.

The really interesting thing was what happened to my observations

First, I found the intersection we had arrived at to be amazingly beautiful. 58th and Maryland is in the very heart of the hospital complex. We sat with some new high-tech medical facility behind us, other hospital buildings to the left and kittycorner, and a parking garage straight ahead. The air was languid and warm but breezy and dozens of sulpher-looking streetlights, high and low, cast kaleidoscopic shadows through hundreds of different shapes. And ivy grew up the side of the parking lot, which I found both idiosyncratic and captivating. The ivy glimmered. There was a hiss of buses and cars over and above all, almost like an ocean.
These are the kinds of things I ordinarily take pains to notice.
Deliberately not noticing was borderline... painful.

Second, while I was able to phase-out my awareness of what was constant around me, whenever something unexpected happened, the sentation was acute, immediate, and confrontational.
Several times people walked by and noticed us. I came to with a sudden shock, almost like cold water contact, followed by a brief embarassment.
At one point, a man walking down the street, thirty or so feet away, kicked a plastic cup, but it sounded like a gun report.

* * * * *

After the exercise, rehearsal was over.
We walked to the Reynolds club, discussing the experience.
Maggy left for the Reg.
Colin and I went to Uncle Joe's.
Colin bought coffee. I bought a Vanilla Coke.
We discussed finding jobs... better jobs.
Then we walked back to the Blackstone, where he said goodbye.
Jessica made some of her tomato soup, which I love.

Yum.

~ Connor